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| You just walked into: Home > Entertainment | February 10th |
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 American Midol: Tina Fey and Her Magnificent MelonsJun 17 2004 by Lani Voivod
Tina Fey's got great melons.How do I know about the state of her melons? Because, fellow melon-obsessee, she wanted me to see them. In fact, she wanted me to see them sooo badly that she gave them a juicy role in her brilliant first feature film scribble: Mean Girls. Now, I don't blame Ms. Fey for writing her boobs into the script. Quite the contrary! This 10-second flash of bodacious honeydewage is a tribute not only to her cleavage, but to her savvy business and marketing sense. Sure, she made it on People magazine's incomparable list of the 50 Most Beautiful People in the World. But chances are she's been stifled over the years, respected for her brains instead of her body. Yes, you read that right. It's a seldom-discussed quandary with women. The dumb, sexy ones move ahead on their looks. That's fine. The smart, none-too-pretty ones wrangle up their spit 'n vigor and forge ahead with nothing but intellectual force and brute willpower. But there's a sub-category - the smart, SEXY ones. And these women are torn, because as much as they're proud of their brains, they really want to be lusted after for their bodies. It's a dirty secret we hate to admit. But it's true, nonetheless. Which brings us back to Ms. Fey. Ms. Fey, with those beautiful, bouncy ta-tas that have just sat there, longing to be seen; tingling to be appreciated. For so long they've played second-fiddle to her sharp wit, her signature specs, her biting sarcasm. "Look at us!" they've cried, perked up and poked out for any pair of wandering eyes to swig. So, after years of polite fortitude, during which she was lauded for being SNL's first female head writer, Tina finally realized: Women with great boobies get ahead further and faster – in career and in life – than those of modest or sub-par bosom. CUT TO: Tina Fey's fabulous Fleshy Betties. She's no longer just a super-talented, hard-working, ultra-respectable broad. She's a certified hottie with dynamite cans. World domination – here comes Tina, in all her knockering, nipply glory! Related Articles American Midol: Fantasia Barrino – OOOH, Lawdy! That Girl's Got Herself Some Pipes! May 19 2004
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May 6 2004
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May 3 2004
American Midol: Buh-Bye, Omarosa! (You Lying, Detestable, Rotten-Spirited, Undermining Ignoramus!)
Apr 16 2004
American Midol: In Defense of Howard Stern
Apr 7 2004
American Midol: Ashton, Colin, and Orlando
Mar 24 2004
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