A Dysfunctional Family of Five Reviews...The Brown Bunny!

"The Brown Bunny" is not, in fact, the lewd sex act that occurs in this movie - there really is an earth-colored rabbit in it. But no doubt you've heard all about the hard-core BJ that had the Cannes audience up in arms. Now you can see it for yourself! (Try to control your excitement.)

Dad: Chloë Sevigny? Yuck! I'd rather carve a hole in the mannequin from Mannequin, fiberglass splinters and all.

Mom: Vincent Gallo? Yuck! I'd rather suck a carrot out of the dirt during locust season, right after a cropduster flyby.

Sis: Omigod, her technique is just awful. I've seen middle school girls on Oprah who could do better than that.

Bro: I've heard so many good things about porn, but this was disgusting. What is this, "Scared Straight" for sex?

Baby: So, Vincent Gallo thinks Easy Rider needs a cinematic takedown, eh? Well Vinnie, you're 35 years too late, you wouldn't even be making movies if it weren't for Easy Rider, and no one outside of the American Film Institute gives two dirty diapers about Easy Rider anymore, you self-aggrandizing piece of binky schmegma.

Verdict: No.


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