A Dysfunctional Family of Five Reviews...Wicker Park!

Alert! Alert! Remake of a French movie! Employs Josh Harnett as a sex symbol! Features repeated time-shifting to incite emotional charges! Good grief, we thought August was over already. Apparently Hollywood still has some useless movies in the bank…

Dad: Criminy, this director must have been like, "Please, pleeeeeeeeeeeease be in my movie, boo hoo hoo hoo hoo! I implore you! I'll strangle this kitten if you don't!"

Mom: Okay, that made no sense. Was he begging or threatening, doofus? Sometimes you make it really hard to stay sexually attracted to you.

Sis: [Pretended to excuse herself to the bathroom, but instead snuck up to the projection booth, where she was shocked to find Roach Kirkson in a clench with the ticket window girl. Chaos, pink slips, and brief police detentions ensued.]

Bro: I missed seeing The Cookout for this?! Now wait just a minizzle!

Baby: If there's ever been a decent American remake of a French film, I've never heard of it. And it's not like this was the cast and crew to pull it off, anyway. Of course, I can't remember where I put that stupid binky I had just three minutes ago, and I haven't moved more than five feet in the last hour.

Verdict: Skip this like a rope in a double-dutch tournament. Rent the original (L'Appartement, which features Monica Bellucci) if you're into the foreign-flick thing.


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