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Pamela Anderson's Left Breast Accidentally Detached in Airport Security Mishap
Actress Pamela Anderson's left breast was accidentally detached by an airport security worker during a routine safety check at the Santa Monica Airport on Wednesday.
Embarrassed security worker Lavoid Ramsbottom immediately offered to reattach it or to call an emergency plastic surgeon, but a furious Anderson icily refused, saying "I'll take it with me," and popped the outsized appendage into a Neiman-Marcus shopping bag. Lawyers for the actress immediately threatened to sue the Department of Homeland Security.
Homeland Security head Michael Chertoff issued a statement apologizing for the gaffe, but warned that al-Qaeda has been known to conceal explosives in apparently innocent body parts. He suggested that Americans cooperate in airport searches by voluntarily removing prosthetic limbs and appendages before attempting to enter airport security checkpoints.
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