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  You have been flattened by: Home > Global News > ArchiveSeptember 8th 
  October 2003
Here's some hysterical stories from those cynical days when we were sure that Saddam would never be captured:

Olsen Twins to Pay for Iraq Reconstruction, National Debt Arnold Announces "Idiot Voter" Ballot Proposition Bush Suspects Leaking Leaker May Not Be Found David Blaine Video Feed Roots Out Iraqi Guerrillas Revealed: Tiger Mauled Roy for Cheating on Him with Siegfried More Loony Right Wing Commentators Arrested Johnny Cochran Wins Concessions, Name Changes from NFL; Ignores NHL Changes Chicago, Boston Police End Mass Suicide Watch Study Concludes Men Don't Get Hot for Lesbians Rummy Proposes Exorcism Intelligence Agency to Fight Islam Sprite Embraces Kobe with New Slogan: "Obey My Thirst, Bitch!" Trick-or-Treaters Demand Reparations for Crappy Halloween Treats



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