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| You have come across: Home > Global News | November 20th |
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Study Concludes Men Don't Get Hot for Lesbians Oct 24 2003 by Allen Voivod Renowned psychologist Dr. Morgan Fanberg has published a new and startling study which concludes that men are not, in fact, sexually stimulated by lesbian women. The study, entitled "The Priapic Response of the Heterosexual Male to Female-on-Female Oral Stimulation," tested the responses of 26,638 randomly selected men from across the United States, across all age groups, racial groups, and socioeconomic strata. Subjects were presented with two scenarios, and sensors placed on their penises recorded levels of erection during the scenarios. "The amazing conclusion we reached was that men were not turned on by lesbians," Dr. Fanberg reported. "The men were only turned on by the bisexual women--that is to say, only those women with whom they may have had a snowball's chance in hell of actually having sex. Of course, these were some pretty ugly guys we picked. They'd be lucky to get one women every 12 years, let alone two in a night," he laughed. For the study, subjects sat in a darkened room, with partitions providing privacy for each subject. In a separate room, two women performed oral sex on each other in a position commonly referred to by the number "sixty-nine." Subjects could see the women through a one-way mirror; the women could not see the subjects. Prior to each "sixty-nine," the two women gave rehearsed speeches. In one scenario, the women launched into a three-minute diatribe which completely denounced the male gender, using insults and insights into the male psyche that reduced many subjects to tears. The women would then proceed to the oral stimulation portion of the experiment. In the other scenario, the two women gave a three-minute speech which praised men and lauded their contributions to the arts, sports, and the comfort of women's lives, and then began the oral stimulation. In both scenarios, after both women had climaxed, subjects were asked to rate their level of stimulation and to provide a brief explanation of their rating. "The women who insulted the men were the lesbians," Dr. Fanberg explained. "None of the subjects could imagine being wanted as a third person in the women's sex act. And as a result, not one of them could get it up. Not a single one. "The women who praised the men were the bisexuals. The subjects could easily picture themselves walking into the room and being welcomed into their sex act. They busted the blood pressure cuffs left and right, let me tell you!" As a reward for participating in the study, subjects were provided with videotapes of the "sixty-nine" sessions, minus the speeches. Subjects were not allowed to use the bathrooms at the test site.
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