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 Saddam's Diaries: Making Love Work with Donald RumsfeldMay 2 2004 by Allen Voivod
When we last looked at Saddam Hussein's diaries, we found an ex-dictator coming out of the honeymoon phase of his reignited relationship with Donald Rumsfeld."I've made an incredible leap of faith," Saddam wrote. "Has the time, the world, changed him? Me? Us?" Rumsfeld's busy schedule would give Saddam ample time to contemplate the questions. "Donny commuting back to DC this morning," Saddam wrote on June 9th. "It's hard, having the whole house to myself for the week, waiting like some concubine for him to come home on the weekends." But Saddam wasn't alone - he had the company of Rumsfeld's diminutive Spanish valet, Humberto. "This Humberto - I don't quite trust him," Saddam wrote on May 16th. "He's too concerned about how my underthings are folded. He refuses to wash my clothes and Donald's in the same load. And he serves dinner without showering off the peculiar smells he picks up during the day." These smells, Saddam would learn, came from Humberto's management of Rumsfeld's working dairy farm. "[Humberto] asked for my assistance today," Saddam wrote on July 12th. "He wanted me to wash the udders on the cows and milk them. It's not much different from how I handle Donny, so I made quick work of it." The work proved to be a balm for Saddam. "This isn't the ideal situation, but at least I'm not as bored now," he mused on July 23rd. "I never expected to come to America to work on a farm. I just knew there wasn't anything left to live for, except love. I spent too much time wallowing in regret. Now Donny and I finally have a chance to make it work." Saddam was quick to point out that there was no trouble in the bedroom - except when Rumsfeld tried to leave it. "Got upset this morning at Donny," Saddam wrote on June 30th. "Wanted him to stay in my arms a little longer, but no, he couldn't be just a few minutes late for a Pentagon meeting. I'm turning into the bitch in this relationship, and I don't like it." Related Articles Secret US Court Lifts Gag Order on DeadBrain, Saddam's Diaries Apr 20 2004
Saddam's Diaries: The Honeymoon with Rumsfeld, and First WorriesJan 27 2004 Saddam's Diary Reveals End of Epic Romance with Donald Rumsfeld Jan 22 2004
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