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| You have fallen into: Home > News | September 7th |
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 Grim Reaper Honors Bush with Golden ScytheMay 23 2004 by John Hetherington
In a ceremony in Tallahassee, Florida, President George W. Bush was presented with the Golden Scythe by the Grim Reaper.In presenting the award, the Reaper noted President Bush's "outstanding contributions to death," acknowledging that while the President may not be as prolific as past winners, "he has the strength of his convictions and uses them to bring death. "Given that he leads a nation inexplicably opposed to death, President Bush been a consistent supporter dating back to his days as Governor of Texas," the Reaper said. It was while Governor of Texas that George W. Bush first became officially involved with death, signing off on 152 executions during his time in office. "Of course, that was just the start!" said the Reaper, who went on to cite Bush's accomplishments since becoming President, including numerous deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan of both Coalition soldiers and enemy combatants. Showing what press materials called his characteristically mischievous sense of humor, the Grim Reaper said that Bush's efforts have earned him the title of "Junior Harvester." Bush was unable to attend the event because of a fundraising conflict, but he told the audience in a prerecorded message, "I believe death is important to our lives. It is important to our freedom. I know when I bring death I am really bringing life, but a different, better life." Among those in attendance were Bush supporter and former George H. W. Bush speechwriter Peggy Noonan. Speaking to everyone with a camera or pencil, Noonan said, "George Bush really has made an art of death. He's shown us all that you can rid the world of anyone in the name of freedom and peace. It's beautiful." The event was hosted by comedienne Whoopi Goldberg, who though opposed to the Bush presidency is said to be a favorite of the Grim Reaper. Presented annually, the Golden Scythe recognizes the individual or organization who actively sought to bring more death to the world. Past recipients have included Adolf Hitler, Pol Pot, Stalin, and Celine Dion, whose ubiquitous rendition of "My Heart Will Go On" inspired countless suicides. Related Articles Reforms at Abu Ghraib to Include Waterboarding, Bible Study May 18 2004
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