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| You have been disturbed by: Home > News | November 20th |
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 Laura Bush Succumbs to Kim Jong Il's Weapons of LustJun 8 2004 by John Hetherington
Attorney General John Ashcroft announced that US intelligence has discovered hundreds of emails and thousands of instant messages which document a secret and torrid long-distance love affair between North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il and First Lady Laura Bush.According to Ashcroft, who had read executive summaries of the messages, "He's smitten with her. His letters are surprisingly tender and romantic." In one email, for example, Kim pledges to "do no more than maim the weakest of your family" should Mrs. Bush reciprocate his feelings. "These aren't the sort of sentiments most Americans associate with Kim," notes Morgan Butler, an expert on the man often referred to as a madman. There is in fact another side to the North Korean leader, who is often rumored to be an interminable womanizer. "He knows how to woo the ladies," Butler explains. "Some may call imprisoning a young lady's family intimidation, but I've seen it turn them to butter." According to Butler, Kim's romantic liaisons are marked by tenderness, something that likely attracted the First Lady to him. "Sure there were floggings and the odd torture rack, but by the time he sends them to the mines, these women have been loved." Perhaps more shocking was Mrs. Bush's response to these electronic overtures, sent to her instant message handle, 1stLayD43. In correspondence addressed affectionately to "My Sweet Bad Man," Mrs. Bush details a growing rift between herself and the President, and expresses interest in the dictator's "dungeons of love" where she believes Kim would turn her into "a sea of fire." According to noted Presidential historian Doris Kearns Goodwin, relationships between First Ladies and tyrants are not new. Lady Bird Johnson was totally entranced by Ho Chi Minh, while Rosalyn Carter actually hung a picture of the Ayatollah Khomeini above her and President Carter's bed. "Some have said that she even made President Carter wear a long white beard during love making," Goodwin said. Responding to the revelations, President Bush indicated that he had not read the emails and instant messages, but was confident that "no one will question my motives this time." Related Articles Reagan's Death Timed to Draw Attention from Bush's Disastrous D-Day Speech Jun 6 2004
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