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| You are hovering over: Home > News | November 20th |
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 Tennessee National Guard Troops Apologize to Rumsfeld; Will Dig Latrines as PenanceDec 11 2004 by Ross Bender
Spc. Thomas "Jerry" Wilson, 31, of Nashville, asked the Secretary why troops going into Iraq have no boots or uniforms and have to march across the desert "in our undies." The unexpected question seemed to surprise Rumsfeld, who threw his hands in the air, jabbed at invisible "pixies," and pirouetted. Pentagon spokesman Larry Di Rita later stated that the Secretary "felt manipulated" by the questions and suspected that unscrupulous reporters had influenced the servicemen to ask embarrassing questions. "It may not look like it from his tough exterior, but Donny is highly sensitive and his feelings were badly hurt by the rude questions from the troops. That’s why we asked for an apology." After Di Rita made Rumsfeld’s feelings plain, an entire company of Tennessee National Guardsmen was ordered to dig latrines in the desert for several weeks to demonstrate the depth of their remorse. The Secretary of Defense plans to return to Kuwait after visiting India and Botswana so that each Guardsmen can personally kiss his ass. Related Articles Intelligence Revamp Glitch Leaves Nation "Temporarily Stupid" Nov 29 2004
Opium Futures Up on Kabul Exchange; Rumsfeld Proclaims Victory in Afghan Drug War
Nov 25 2004
From Condi with Love: A Swarm of Locusts Attacks Israel
Nov 22 2004
Ridge Announces "Code Green" Status for Smallest Nebraska Town
Nov 9 2004
Jet Strafes School to Thwart Terrorists; "Definitely Not" George Bush on a Victory Joyride
Nov 5 2004
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