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Chickens in Boxing Gloves? That's Just the Start!
An Oklahoma state senator's proposal to reinstate cockfighting by putting tiny boxing gloves on roosters says it won't make his state a national laughingstock and doesn't show that he's insane.
"Quite the contrary, it proves that we have compassion for the chickens that made cockfighting a $100-million industry in Oklahoma," said state Sen. Frank Shurden. "We only want what's best for the roosters and the greatest cockfighting fans in the world."
In addition to the boxing gloves, the fighting chickens would wear lightweight chicken vests to protect themselves, Shurden said.
"We want to take every precaution to protect the chickens, so they don't end up at KFC in a diminished condition," Shurden said. "I realize that the old rules - which provided that chickens fight with razor blades - was a little barbaric, even by Oklahoma standards."
Shurden said cockfighting, prior to its ban in 2002, was extremely popular in Oklahoma. "Let's face it, the state doesn't have a whole lot going for it," Shurden said. "We have the Oklahoma Sooners football team, some Native American reservations and the stigma of the Oklahoma City bombing - that's about it. We want to show the nation that we're more than trailer parks and a perceived lack of sophistication."
Shurden said the vests would included sensors - similar to what is used in fencing, a sport pretty much foreign to Oklahoma - that would record the number of chicken blows during the fight. Spectators would then know which chicken was leading, and would have real-time results to track their bets. "It's win-win for everybody," Shurden said.
"Not so," replied Jill Hayward, spokesman for the Oklahoma Coalition Against Cockfighting.
"We thought we got rid of this blood sport once and for all," Hayward said. "How can we join the 21st century and attract business with this going on? Even the University of South Carolina, whose nickname is the Gamecocks, doesn't have cockfights at halftime.
"Perhaps fights to the death between legislators," Hayward added, "would be more fun."
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