 |
|
|
|
| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humor · Jennifer Lopez |
|
 |
|
| You have trodden in: Home > Politics | February 10th |
| |
|
 Charley Attacks Florida; Kerry Has Unexpected 'Nam FlashbackAug 17 2004 by NM Puff
"I knew Charlie was cunning, but this is unbelievable," Kerry said as he changed into combat uniform. Kerry immediately surmised that the attack must have come from the Everglades and ordered his private jet to head to Florida. "He's obsessed with his post-war-trauma 'Charlie' thing," said an unnamed source. "I'm worried that, if elected, he'll preemptively attack Vietnam. He's fixated that the job was unfinished. Every time we tell him 'Charley' was a hurricane and not the 'Cong,' he says 'That's what they want you to believe.'" President Bush, on hearing of Kerry heading to Florida, ordered Donald Rumsfeld to send him the flight suit he wore when landing on the deck of the carrier USS Abraham Lincoln, saying, "If he (Kerry) wants to re-fight Vietnam, bring it on." He then added, "Who is 'charley'?" Kerry informed the traveling press that the United States may have to launch a preemptive war to "avoid terrible attacks like these in the future." Kerry, while shoving bullets into his pearl handled revolver, said he missed the adrenaline rush of war. "We should have finished them off when we had the chance," intoned Kerry. At the same time, Bush has ordered a photo-op at the White House to include him in full flight suit, according to his political advisor Karl Rove. "The symbols of war are more important than fighting it," said Rove in describing the President proudly clutching his helmet. With the race on to "save Florida," both candidates have swung into full attack mode. While Kerry only believes "Charlie" has attacked Florida, President Bush has upped the ante by hinting that WMDs might be found there as well. Related Articles Charley Attacks Florida; Kerry Has Unexpected 'Nam Flashback Aug 17 2004
America's Unemployed Linked to Al-Qaeda
Aug 16 2004
Survey: Seniors Jonesing for Canadian Fix
Aug 16 2004
Colin Powell, Ahmed Chalabi Skipping RNC Bash
Aug 12 2004
Democrats: GOP Silenced Rick James to Prevent Kerry Endorsement
Aug 11 2004
Bush May Become Cable Fishing Show Co-Host
Aug 11 2004
|
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |
| Copyright ©2003-2008 DeadBrain. All rights reserved violently. | Disclaimer | Privacy Policy | Survey | Vermin |