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| You are just out of reach of: Home > Politics | November 21st |
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 Cheney's Daughter Gets Plum JobFeb 25 2005 by Greg Kuhl
"Elizabeth Cheney was chosen after an exhaustive search, far and wide, from sea to shining purple mountains majesty," President George W. Bush said. "She takes after her father. Diplomacy is her middle name." Bush said Cheney "will follow the path taken by my other great appointments - that Hispanic guy for attorney general, whose footsteps can trample the Constitution in the true Ashcroftian tradition. "And that African-American woman, what's her name, who's now Secretary of State," Bush said. "I figured with this appointment, I could appease any lesbians who might be opposed to me. Wait, Elizabeth isn't the lesbian. That's her sister. "Nonetheless, Elizabeth Cheney's breadth of knowledge and experience will serve her well in the Middle East, and serve America too," Bush said. "She's the blonde one, right? No, it's not nepotism. What's that?" Cheney said she realized that some people would think that she only got the job because she's the Vice President's daughter. "And they could be right, but I'll never admit it," she said. "The fact remains, it's now my job and America will have to just live with it." The President said his twin daughters, Jenna and Barbara, threw a "major league diva hissy fit" when they learned that Elizabeth Cheney got the plum job. "But they'll get over it," Bush said. "They were in line to become my co-envoys to the Middle East until that latest round of partying at my inauguration. The Middle East just isn't the place to be gulping down alcohol and getting crazy on the dance floor. "I'll have to find something constructive for them to do, but out of harm's way," Bush said. "Is the Luxembourg ambassadorship open?" Related Articles North Korea Opens Arms Talks With Tommy Hilfiger Feb 19 2005
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