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Cheney Wants to Lock Up the Kids
The Bush Administration said today it would spend $42 billion on a program to identify and imprison violent elementary school pupils.
Vice President Dick Cheney said the new plan was hatched after a 10-year-old rural Kansas boy blew away his father with a 20-gauge shotgun and an eight-year-old Philadelphia girl stuck 19 classmates with her mother's needle used to treat diabetes.
"No more coddling, no more namby-pamby stuff," Cheney said. "America shouldn't have to tolerate this type of behavior from anyone, much less a bunch of little rugrats."
Cheney said the program, called "They're Not Going to Get Away With Murder, Or Anything Else, Any More," would be funded through a new national tax. If necessary, it would also take money from the Homeland Security budget.
"Hey, it's not as though our Homeland Security dollars have bought us much peace of mind," Cheney said. "Maybe we need to re-focus our energy away from terrorists and onto a real problem - our out-of- control youth."
Cheney said children who are convicted of violent acts would be sent away for lengthy prison terms in North Dakota, instead of being kept by juvenile authorities until they turn 21.
For example, Cheney said, a murder or armed robbery conviction could result in a sentence of life without parole. Even stealing another kid's milk money, with or without a weapon, may result in 20 years in prison.
"If long prison sentences don't work, then we may be forced to go with the death penalty," Cheney said. "We just have to stop this stuff somehow. It's obvious that allowing them to return to their parents or staying in juvenile custody for awhile doesn't work.
"Put the fear of God, the Republican God, into them. What better way to get their attention than to see a photo of seven-year-old Johnny or 11-year-old Susie behind bars, doing hard time?" Cheney said. "It would warm the cockles of my heart, if I had one."
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