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| You just spat on: Home > Politics | December 5th |
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 Last American MIAs from Vietnam War Discovered in the White HouseJun 28 2005 by Nick Glauben
Khai announced his discovery during a White House press conference, marking the first time a leader of a united Vietnam has visited the United States. Bush and other senior US government officials met with Khai for a half hour in the Oval Office before the President made a statement thanking him for continuing the search for Americans missing in the war. The State Department says 1,398 still fit into that category. "No problem, Mr. President," Khai said, noting that all he had to do to reduce that number to 1,394 was walk into the Oval Office meeting attended by Bush, Vice President Dick Cheney, House Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-TX), and House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-IL). If fact, Khai expressed his belief that he could reduce the number of MIAs by another dozen or so if allowed to address a joint session of Congress. "We're very pleased at the level of cooperation the Prime Minister has shown to solve this puzzling mystery," said White House Spokesman Scott McClellan, as he quickly hustled Khai out of the room. "It's very comforting for the families and friends of these men to have this information." When told of Khai's discovery of his former Texas Air National Guard roomie, Lloyd "Mustang" Bentsen, Jr., wept with joy. "I always wondered what happened to him," he said, sipping champagne at the Crawford Country Club. "It was months before we found another guy who could tap a keg without foaming the beer." As a show of solidarity with the Vietnamese people, the President has vowed to travel to Vietnam to attend the Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation summit scheduled to be held there in 2006. "Rummy is pretty sure the shooting has died down by now," the President said. "All I have to do is schedule a physical to confirm that I'm healthy enough to fly, and I should be all set to go." Get DeadBrain delivered to your Inbox! Click here to sign up at our parent site. Consider the weekly and monthly editions, each of which contain all-new, laugh-out-loud office comedy you won't see on the website! Related Articles Downing Street Memo a Fake, Says Eminent Grammarian Jun 27 2005
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